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Well, Joan, I hear ya. After doing the same searching on the site, I found the same info you did, and had the same problems. Then I pestered some people offline for more info, and they were helpful but I think there are just some things that you have to see to understand.
Like you, I switched to a direct (but not alla prima - I take too long) method, what Kurt Anderson calls a "searching" method in his book. By this, he means you start out mostly right, and get more and more right as the painting progresses.
Marvin, his method is much like yours, and I confess, I have studied your online demo for hours and hours. I'm sure it is a eureka moment in person and wish your classes were closer so I could take one.
So Joan, hang in there. Your drawing is great, which is half the battle. I can't help you with the painting, just wanted to "validate your feelings."
Best
Lisa
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